[peels back a cucumber slice and gives him a glare]

You don't get to be witheringly sarcastic! That's my job! As captain of this vessel I'd report you to the highest authority! And since that will be me once I get my shoes on, you'd better watch your well rounded backside.

[she sips the water]

And this is warm. How am I expected to enjoy a stimulating ocean cruise with warm water, I ask you.